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Making Up - Listening From The Heart

To make up with your ex, there is no one solution that will work for everyone. Each break up happens for a different main reason. The three main reasons are that you wronged your partner, or they wronged you, or there was relationship drift and they just aren't that into you anymore.

One of the reasons many relationships break up is because of a lack of good communication. The couple stops talking about things that are important to them, then they can even stop talking about little things. Communicating with your partner is a form of intimacy. Not communicating with your partner is a way to kill off your relationship.

If bad communication was a cause of your relationship ending, take heart. There are some things you can do to get your ex back. Basically, you need to show that you've learned and that you can be a good listener and a good communicator.

This is not hard to do. To begin with, you can call your ex and tell him or her how you feel about them. Open up and share yourself, say what it is like to be without them, say what it feels like in your heart. Be vulnerable. Speak from your heart. It will often touch theirs.

Then, demonstrate to your ex that you are a good listener. Focus on getting them to open up and talk to you. You might inquire: "how do you feel about how I treated you when we were together?"

One way to be a good listener is to be quiet. So ask a question then shut up. Be okay with some silence. Let your ex take all the time they want to consider their feelings and start to share them with you.

Another skill to listening is to make your ex feel heard and understood. As they start telling you how your behaviors made them feel, you want to make them feel heard. You say things like I hear you, I follow you, I'm with you You say these things as appropriate so your ex feels heard. This will cause your ex to really open up to you, which is very important to getting them back.

Another important listening skill is to not justify or defend yourself while your ex is telling you how you made them feel. Don't argue, attack, or defend. Listen until they are done, make them feel heard, and at the end, if appropriate, apologize for any way you wronged your mate.

There is more to being a great communicator. But just starting with these few things can begin to turn things around. Your ex may see you in a new light, as someone interested in them and willing to listen. This can soften their heart.

It will take more than being a good listener to get your ex back, but do not underestimate this tool.  If your ex starts feeling really heard and understood around you it can get them thinking about how nice it would be to have you around more.

Using this skill along with a few others can make a big difference when it comes to getting your ex back. You can often get them back in hours or days instead of waiting months and hoping they get over it!  If you would like to get your ex back without weeks of work you can check out the complete Immediate Reconnect method here at Get Your Love Back Now.  When you know the right steps to take, you can often have a solid chance of making up with your ex within 24 hours.